


mud on your face, you big disgrace

by bemusedlybespectacled (ardentintoxication)



Series: Maleval Week 2014 [3]
Category: Maleficent (2014)
Genre: F/M, Humor, Maleval Week, Triple Drabble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-23
Updated: 2014-07-23
Packaged: 2018-02-10 01:54:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2006568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ardentintoxication/pseuds/bemusedlybespectacled
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Diaval has a less-than-pleasant morning.</p><p>For Maleval Week: the day 3 prompt was "Aurora the Matchmaker (+Laughter)."</p>
            </blockquote>





	mud on your face, you big disgrace

When he lands before his mistress after a particularly difficult scout, he can tell that she's in a particularly volatile mood. Her back is to him, stiff and unbent, and she snaps her fingers without looking at him.

"Report."

Diaval rolls his eyes but does so. "No sign of any armies moving toward the Wall, mistress. It seems that the fire scared them off."

"For now," she says coldly. "What of the little beast?"

"She's fine," he says, "despite the best efforts of her aunts."

"Perhaps I'll pay them a visit," she says, turning. "I-"

She stops.

"What on _earth_ happened to you?" she asks, and her voice sounds odd.

"Trolls, mistress," he says. "Mud-slinging trolls."

"But that doesn't explain the-" she gestures vaguely at him.

"That would be the pixies."

"And the-"

"Brownies." That last needs no explanation.

"I see," she says, and her voice is tight. Her face contorts with effort, but she can't control herself, and she bursts into peals of laughter.

"It's not funny," Diaval protests.

"Oh, come on, yes it is," she says. "You look perfectly ridiculous."

"You try being covered in mud and flower petals and, and _glitter!_ "

Maleficent just cackles louder.

"Your sympathy melts my heart," says Diaval. "I've _no_ idea why people think you cold and unfeeling."

"Oh, come here, you silly thing." A wave of her hand and a soft curl of gold magic around him and he's clean again, without the flower petals stuck to his hair or the glitter in the creases of his scars. "Better?"

"Yes," Diaval huffs. "But I'll have my revenge, just you wait. When you least expect it-"

Maleficent turns him into a raven again to shut him up.

Years later, when Maleficent, too, is hit by a troll's mud, Diaval gets the last laugh.


End file.
